How many of us counted the cost (both emotionally and financially) of what it would take to raise a child and/or care for an aging parent? Many are doing both…Because we love our child, we don’t often consider the cost because we simply do what is needed and want the best for them.
My daughter arrived in the Intensive Care Unit (ICU) in the middle of the night on the eve of Thanksgiving. A tough respiratory virus attacked her lungs, and she needed a substantial amount of oxygen support. And now, this unexpected illness meant Thanksgiving was going to be completely different than we had all planned.
Are you scrounging for thankfulness this holiday season? Holidays can be a challenge for those walking through hard days. Perhaps you feel like you've been handed the short-end of the stick; your child is struggling, you’re exhausted and it seems like everybody else has life with a bit more gravy. It’s easy to focus on our circumstances, take stock of what we have and where we are and end up feeling completely void of thankfulness. Is there a cure for this?
I first suspected I had ADHD as a teenager, but finding the right professional to take me seriously was much harder than I expected. Previous attempts only ended in frustration and tears.
Enjoying the holidays with a food allergy sounds like an oxymoron doesn’t it? After all, eating together is an integral component of the holiday season. I looked forward to making our traditional holiday foods until I was diagnosed with a dairy allergy in 2012. What was to enjoy about the holidays when the foods associated with it were off limits to me?
Only when challenges slap me upside the head do I return to practicing gratitude in hard seasons. I was about to tumble into a pit of depression––a condition that has rarely reared its ugly head in my life––when God brought to mind a practice my husband and I first used decades ago while caring for our son with special needs. Every day I have been practicing daily gratitude in a hard season. Finding reasons to be thankful instead of wallowing in the hard bits took some getting used to. But eventually I got the hang of it and ended up with a long list.
It’s sometimes even hard to fathom, but I am now a caregiver caring for multiple generations of my family. Like me, there are many finding themselves sandwiched between two generations and caring for both. It is without a doubt, one of the hardest roads to walk. I’m thankful for the strategies that I’ve learned along the way which have helped me to not merely survive but thrive on my journey as a caregiver.
I would like to drive up to some magical office building and order into a speaker, “Yes, I’d like to order an easy day for my family please.” Then my daughter, if only for a day, would have a fully functioning heart and lungs. Many healed in the Bible, while healed in a moment, suffered for long before. This gives me hope to press on another day, and to keep praying for the Lord and His healing.
Personal experience taught me that disability caregiving is a time intensive and worthy endeavor. It is emotionally intensive as well, filled with grief, fear, uncertainty, frustration, overwhelming love, and guilt. Caregiving is the hardest thing you will ever do, but it is also the best thing you'll ever experience, the holiest act you will ever perform, the purest love you will ever demonstrate, the most Christ-like sacrifice you may ever make.
