Have you ever heard the saying "The straw that broke the camel's back"? In this episode, Catherine Boyle will discuss what we can do to help lighten the load on another person’s mental health. It's easier than you might think!
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Quick Links:
The Relationship Between Mental Health and Cleaning Article
Lisa Jamieson with Walk Right In Ministries
Key Ministry Mental Health Webinar
Transcript:
This is Catherine Boyle, and you are listening to Key Ministry: The Podcast Episode 7, “The Straw That Saved The Camel’s Back.” In this episode, we’ll talk about some simple practical things that any church or Christ follower can do to help another person’s mental health.
If you’ve enjoyed our podcasts so far, click subscribe in your podcast app, so you never miss an episode from me or my fellow co-hosts, Dr. Steve Grcevich, Beth Golik, Dr. Lamar Hardwick, and Sandra Peoples.
Most people have heard the old adage about ‘the straw that broke the camel’s back.’ This expression means that one tiny, nearly weightless item was all it took to cause an overburdened camel to collapse from the weight it was carrying.
The expression is tossed around when an individual or organization falls apart after something small and seemingly insignificant. That last straw could be anything: an unkind remark at a vulnerable moment, an unexpected bill, an employee who quits at the worst possible time, an illness that takes you by surprise. Any small thing can become a big thing in a hurry if there is already a pile of ‘small things’ that you have to carry.
But what if - instead of a small thing being added which led to a breakdown, a small thing could be removed, and have the opposite effect?
A large portion of our audience is made up of people whose mental clutter simply can’t be eliminated because the needs of their loved ones with disabilities can’t be set aside. So what can caregiving individuals and families do, if it’s impossible to get rid of that one straw?
Could it be as simple as taking one or two things off a caregiver’s task list? Could that small act of kindness provide caregivers with a tiny mental break, leading to newfound mental capacity, by creating space to think through existing challenges with just a little more breathing room than they had before?
The answer is yes! And Church, this is your cue to step in.
Churches, and the body of Christ within them, are an army of often untapped resources, wisdom, and talent, and frequently include people who desire to give to and serve others who have mental health needs.
In my time working in the mental health ministry, it’s obvious that churches recognize the very real challenges of individuals and families struggling with depression, anxiety, and significant life stressors. But churches are made up of humans, people who don’t want to do the wrong thing, so too often, they just don’t do anything. They think of mental health ministry as another silo ministry in the church when really, it’s a mindset or approach to thinking about the needs every person has, especially when that last straw is placed on a heavily laden life.
To demonstrate how this might work within your church or small group, I asked a few ministry friends to share some of the creative, super helpful things that their church or local Christ-followers have done to remove one or two ‘straws’ that lifted their mental load. These friends are each caregivers for a loved one with significant needs and have been honest about how the ongoing, relentless demands of caregiving have impacted their own mental health. And if you’re like me, seeing another person’s example can open up ideas about what can be done, or at least offered, for caregivers in your church or community.
Jess Ronne from Jess Plus the Mess shared that a friend and fellow mom once took all of Jess’ kids shoe shopping, right before the start of the school year. What a blessing! Another friend once came to Jess’ home and gave all the kids haircuts, including her disabled son Luke. Those two things might not sound like ministry to some, but Jess and her family were powerfully shown God’s love by these two friends.
Lisa Jamieson from Walk Right In Ministries mentioned that a blessing for her family has been having ‘an encouraging adult presence with young typical siblings,’ within Lisa’s home. She gave examples of an adult who could help with the typical child’s homework or help keep the child on task while practicing musical instruments.
Cindi Ferrini has often shared the story of a young single adult in her church who noticed that Cindi and her husband Joe didn’t attend church together. This perceptive young man offered to be a buddy to Cindi and Joe’s son Joey, in the class Joey attended, so Cindi and Joe could be in the worship service together.
Shelly Roberts and her husband have two adopted children with congenital complex medical needs. When someone lives with complex medical needs, having prescriptions filled at local pharmacies is a regular occurrence. One of Shelly’s friends has occasionally picked up prescriptions for her. For most of us, going to the local pharmacy is a quick trip, but this small kindness meant that Shelly’s child got medicine more quickly, and eliminated the challenges of transporting Shelly’s children who are only mobile by using wheelchairs.
Shelly’s family has been away from church for health reasons for a long season, and she mentioned how simple in-person visits are a treasure. Shelly also stated what a wonderful gift it is to have a clean car, saying, “a clean vehicle is SO refreshing when you’re facing difficult things.”
Have you ever had someone do something simple for you, something that made a huge difference? Didn’t it feel like the whole world was a better place? Such simple gestures can develop deep friendships, for the parents and the whole family, friendships which themselves help reduce the likelihood of isolation and depression for both sets of friends.
So church, who in your community could use a hand? The people who need the mental break the most may not be asking for help. Just open your eyes to the extra challenges that families with disabilities face, and you’ll likely find plenty of opportunities for small means of support, and friendship.
If you’re a parent whose child with special needs has grown, and perhaps no longer requires as much of your hands-on care, you may be the perfect person to connect with a local family, or share with your church family some simple help that can make a world of difference.
And even better, research confirms what the Bible states, the blessing of others benefits you, too. Studies have found that on the days people show acts of kindness to others, their own stress is reduced.
Thank you so much for listening to today’s episode of Key Ministry: The Podcast, where we discussed bearing one another’s burdens as an important ingredient in mental health ministry. You can find a transcript of this episode and other show notes at keyministry.org/podcast. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and give it a 5-star rating! And be sure to share the podcast in your social media so your friends can find us, too. Join us next week for another episode of Key Ministry: The Podcast!
“Bear one another’s burdens, and thereby fulfill the law of Christ.” Galatians 6:2 NASB
