The church is a place for everyone, yet for many families with neurodivergent children, attending church events or services can be a challenging experience.
Children with sensory and communication differences may need unique accommodations to feel comfortable, included, and valued. As the new year rolls in, consider these three simple yet impactful ways to create a more welcoming environment for neurodivergent kids and their families.
1. Offer Quiet or Low-Stimulation Spaces
Church events—such as new or different services, holiday events, and celebrations—can be vibrant and bustling. But for some kids, these environments can quickly become overwhelming. Setting up a quiet or low-stimulation area can make a world of difference.
This could be a room or designated space with dim lighting, comfortable seating, and calming items like weighted blankets, noise-canceling headphones, or fidget toys. Our church doesn’t have a dedicated sensory space, but we have already communicated with our church leadership about which spaces are ideal for my family to step away, recalibrate, and regulate.
Whatever they look like, these areas can be a safe haven where children (and their families) can take sensory breaks without fear of judgment. A space like this gently communicates, “We see you, we understand your needs, and we’ve planned for your comfort.”
Making families aware of this option in advance can be just as important as creating the space itself. Include it in event announcements, bulletins, or signage so families know they have a place just for them if they need it.
2. Encourage Flexible Participation in Programs & Activities
Traditional church activities, while joyful for many, may not resonate in the same way with neurodivergent children. Some participants might prefer observing a nativity play rather than acting in it, or they might need extra time to warm up to group singing or crafts. Flexibility is key for any activity.
Train your church staff and volunteers to embrace diverse forms of participation. Whether a child chooses to fully engage, observe quietly, or do an activity differently, all forms of involvement should be celebrated and respected. Clear communication with families about this flexibility is crucial.
Ask the family if there are specific things you can do to accommodate their child. We communicated with our children’s ministry about our children’s diagnoses and suggested some language and strategies in the event our child needs extra support. We also shared a list of interests with the church so they can initiate conversation with preferred topics, if needed.
Let them know their children are welcome to engage at their own comfort level and that your church values the unique ways every child connects. This approach not only supports the child but also reassures families that their presence matters—no conditions attached.
3. Avoid Singling Out Children or Families for “Different” Behavior
For families with neurodivergent children, one of our greatest fears can be the stigma of being judged or singled out. Some children may express themselves in ways that are less conventional—whether it’s stimming or making unexpected noises, needing to move around, or requiring extra support.
As a church community, it’s vital to foster a culture of understanding and kindness. Small steps like these can have a big impact:
Provide reminders to the congregation, such as “Everyone worships, connects, and participates in their own way, and that’s okay. We are all fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14).”
Encourage volunteers and staff to model compassion by offering help discreetly and never drawing attention to behavior differences in a way that might seem negative or cause embarrassment.
Reinforce to families that your church is a judgment-free zone where all expressions of faith and engagement are embraced.
Image from @caleb_woods on Unsplash
By creating an atmosphere that prioritizes belonging over conformity, you communicate a powerful message: Every one of God’s image-bearers is welcome here.
Remember: welcoming neurodivergent kids and their families into your church doesn’t require monumental changes—just intentionality, understanding, and a willingness to adapt.
By offering quiet spaces, allowing flexible participation, and cultivating a culture of kindness, your church can be a place where every child, regardless of their needs, feels seen, loved, and included. What a gift to be a place that makes room for everyone at the table.
Sunita Theiss is an Indian American poet and writer in Georgia. Following her children’s diagnoses, she pursued and received autism and ADHD diagnoses herself. After more than a decade working in marketing and communications, Sunita has intentionally made a downshift in her career, which allows her the flexibility and freedom to be more hands-on with her family and homeschool her children. Her writing has been featured in Christianity Today, In Touch, Business Insider’s Parenting section, and more. You can read more of her work at sunitatheiss.com.
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