My daughter is many things to different people. During the brief times our lives intersect, strangers may form an impression based solely upon how my daughter, Jaycee, looks. Her Down syndrome says something to most people even when they don’t know her.
Most acquaintances seem to view Jaycee as a sweet teenaged girl. If they aren’t around her often, they will struggle to converse with Jaycee due to her limited speech, but her hugs easily transcend words.
People who know Jaycee best often describe her as funny and full of personality. They know Jaycee loves to make jokes, smack people (lovingly) on the behind, and sing a wide plethora of Disney and Christian rock songs. The longer people are around Jaycee, the more her Down syndrome fades into the background. People get to know Jaycee for who she is, and there’s much to uncover.
To me, there’s one attribute that best describes my daughter. She is the most loving person I know. Jaycee oozes love. She doesn't care if it's a stranger or a familiar person. Whether the person likes her or not, Jaycee loves and isn’t shy about displaying it.
A few years ago, I took Jaycee to a pumpkin patch. As she waited in line to get her face painted, she was surrounded by a few other little girls. A younger child sat in a seat in front of Jaycee patiently waiting for her turn. Jaycee bent over and kissed the little girl on the head three times in the span of five minutes. Jaycee would smile brightly after each kiss as she looked at the girl with such adoration. The small child didn't quite know how to take Jaycee's affection, but didn’t stop it.
Some people may see Jaycee's affectionate displays as inappropriate, given she was a tween at the time. Jaycee doesn't often go around hugging and kissing strangers, but she does have moments when she will spontaneously love on younger children. When I see her love others in this manner, I see the heart of God.
Our society doesn't act like her, me included. I don't go around hugging and loving on most people, especially strangers. I am more reserved and keep my feelings to myself. Saying hi to strangers would be a stretch for me. Unlike Jaycee, I often wait for people to make the first good-willed gesture towards me.
My daughter loves people the way God wants us to—holding nothing back. She doesn't wait for the person to reach out in love first; she gives it away with no expectation of it being returned. There’s no fear of rejection or strings attached. She freely loves.
This allows Jaycee to get along with people who are sometimes difficult to love. Once, I was perplexed by a certain individual who enjoyed Jaycee’s company, but didn't often seem to enjoy the companionship of anyone else. My father explained, "It's easy to understand. Jaycee loves everyone with no judgment. That person can feel it."
Jaycee is able to recognize the good in people. She doesn't hold grudges or repay bad behavior with bad behavior. She doesn't get an attitude with people, for the most part. Jaycee loves and loves well. It’s what I value most about her. I fall short of the scriptures that tell us to love others. Jaycee, on the other hand, seems to instinctively know how to do this.
As World Down Syndrome Day is celebrated on March 21st, I will recognize and honor everything my daughter is. Beyond her Down syndrome is an amazing and wonderful girl. What I value most in Jaycee is her loving nature. Her love shows me the heart of God. Who wouldn’t celebrate that?
Evana is a wife and mother of two children. Since becoming a parent, Evana has spent many hours driving to specialty appointments, praying beside a hospital bed, and learning about her children’s diagnoses. Evana is also a pediatric speech-language pathologist and serves children with autism, feeding disorders, and other developmental delays. You can connect with Evana on Twitter, Facebook, and her blog, A Special Purposed Life. You can also read more about her family’s story in her book, Badges of Motherhood: One Mother’s Story about Family, Down syndrome, Hospitals, and Faith.
