No one on this earth knows how to give better than a mother.
As soon as that little one takes occupancy in the womb, the mother gives of her body in ways that are not quite understood until it is experienced. The body changes dramatically over months, never to be quite the same as it was. Stretch marks appear, shifts within the body happen, and yet the mother adapts to the process.
With effort and love, the mother gives birth to her child. Pain and discomfort are endured from the mother for weeks as her body recovers from the delivery. While recovering, the mother gives up her sleep, schedule, and time as she cares for her newborn. The payoff is worth it all because that baby is loved beyond imaginable.
The giving continues throughout the years. A mother gives up all sorts of time, money, and bits of herself to raise her child and ensure safety and happiness for her offspring.
@zlucerophoto From Unsplash
For the mom raising a child with special needs, the giving is exponential. She devotes time and energy to researching doctors, therapists, or ways to help their child achieve more in life. The mother gives up ‘free time,’ maybe not even consciously, because their child needs more support and attention than typically expected. The mother gives up preferences that do not line up with their child’s. If the child suddenly decides to obsess over a color, tv character, or food, the mother joins in and finds what she can to connect to her child.
When the mother finds herself rearing a child with medical conditions, she stretches and surrenders parts of herself that she did not even know were within her. This mother too gives an ample amount of her time driving to appointments and researching their child’s condition. The mother gives out medications and medically necessary treatments to her child, sometimes through tears, to make sure their child stays healthy. She gives up a comfortable bed to sleep near her child in a chair or the floor at home or in the hospital. The mother gives her child over to doctors, who wheel them away for a surgery or procedure, while maintaining a brave face as true emotions are pushed down.
Yes, mothers are experts on giving whether your child has special or medical needs or not.
This time of year is known as the season of giving. Gifts, food, and money will all be exchanged this month as we show others we care and are thinking of them.
Mothers, I urge you to take time to give back to yourself.
There are things mothers need to do for themselves this Christmas season.
Reflect on all the ways you give of yourself throughout the year. Even if you feel like you are failing in some areas of your life, think about the wins, successes, and things that are getting accomplished. Don’t be so hard on yourself.
Give yourself a break. Perhaps it’s a mental break where you allow yourself a compliment or a physical break where you take an afternoon for yourself. Finally, give yourself a reminder of what your life was created to do. Spend time in prayer, listening to those beautiful Christmas songs, or searching the scripture. Our lives are bigger than us. Our actions have a ripple effect on our immediate family and beyond. It’s important to remember God is the source of our strength and joy and the master of giving.
I pray that this Christmas you can seek the giver of all things to replenish your spirit. Then you can continue being a true leader in giving to your family.
Evana is a wife and mother of two children. She enjoys serving in her church’s special-needs ministry. Evana is also a pediatric speech-language pathologist and serves children with autism, feeding disorders, and other developmental delays. You can connect with Evana on Twitter, Facebook, and her blog, A Special Purposed Life. You can also read more about her family’s story in her book, Badges of Motherhood: One Mother’s Story about Family, Down syndrome, Hospitals, and Faith.
