When God redeemed my worst Christmas ever by using it for good, it came as a big surprise. Most likely because 1982 was the year of my worst Christmas ever, and the using it for good part didn’t come along until December of 2024. 42 years is a long time, which explains my surprise.
Seasons help us to realize we’re not alone. We might still feel alone but we can see things differently and then change our thinking, and even our responses. We know everyone goes through “stuff” but sometimes we need to recognize it just happens to be our turn. The harder part is that we still have someone we are caring for full time, 24/7 added to the new hard stuff!
For families like mine, with an autistic child and my own ADHD and anxiety, Christmas is rarely “calm” or “bright.” In fact, it is often loud, noisy, and overwhelming. Our children get overwhelmed by the lights and the new items. We, as parents, get overwhelmed by all the mess and noise. There are so many sensory inputs flowing through that you feel like you are in a never-ending vacuum of noise. And, that doesn’t even take into account that I’m operating on just a few hours of sleep after leading multiple Christmas services as a pastor.
Ruth saw a bright future for herself. She didn’t have an exact plan in front of her. But at 18, she vaguely knew what she wanted in the future: a master’s degree, a husband, a job she enjoyed, and children. Emma was on another path altogether. When Emma turned 18, she was already enrolled in a school for students with more significant disabilities.
Zechariah, despite being visited by an angel, doubted what he had been told, and so Gabriel told him that because of this doubt, Zechariah would not be able to speak until his son was born. So, he became unable to speak, and therefore unable to communicate through speech. What did he do? And what does his story teach us about people who cannot communicate by speech, or choose not to, today?
The interviewer asked how caregiving impacted Marjorie’s spiritual journey, and what spiritual practices she found most helpful. With a laugh, Marjorie responded that caring for her mother and mother-in-law was her spiritual practice. What she said hit me like a thunderbolt: for 25 years, caring for my son, Joel, who has autism, was my spiritual practice.
Parenting a child with additional needs or disabilities can be hectic, a bit overwhelming too, with so much to juggle, so much unpredictability and so many battles to fight, especially in these difficult times. So when precious moments come along, it is important to cherish them, enjoy them, to squeeze every single drop of joy out of them, a bit like we did with a very special moment a while ago.
For many special needs kids, they are more comfortable not socializing. I am concerned, as our social distancing and quarantine goes on for months, it will be difficult for many kids to transition back to socializing with more people, besides in the comfort of our own homes. Here are three things you can start now, to help your child not be too anxious or nervous to leave home, once we start getting back to ‘normal.’
