There were young kids, teens, young adults, even his best friend, all playing together, learning and laughing. But, there was no sign of my child. I searching the parking lot where everyone was talking and hanging out with their families; not there either. Here is where most people panic. But, deep down I knew; look with the younger kids. It was there I found him, rolling down the hill, filled with that bold childhood laughter, having the time of his life. No pressure here. No one asking him to make quick decisions he had to worry about in that football game. There was only freedom and joy. I want him to be something he isn’t sometimes, but I’m learning to start finding the thankful in disability.
How many of us counted the cost (both emotionally and financially) of what it would take to raise a child and/or care for an aging parent? Many are doing both…Because we love our child, we don’t often consider the cost because we simply do what is needed and want the best for them.
My daughter arrived in the Intensive Care Unit (ICU) in the middle of the night on the eve of Thanksgiving. A tough respiratory virus attacked her lungs, and she needed a substantial amount of oxygen support. And now, this unexpected illness meant Thanksgiving was going to be completely different than we had all planned.
Are you scrounging for thankfulness this holiday season? Holidays can be a challenge for those walking through hard days. Perhaps you feel like you've been handed the short-end of the stick; your child is struggling, you’re exhausted and it seems like everybody else has life with a bit more gravy. It’s easy to focus on our circumstances, take stock of what we have and where we are and end up feeling completely void of thankfulness. Is there a cure for this?
Moms (and probably Dads, too) are constantly analyzing in the rearview mirror of life what we did right and wrong. I have worked very hard at being an intentional and “always there” mom. Due to that very fact, I have had much opportunity in our special needs life to make plenty of mistakes. Here are a few thoughts regarding my parenting that I did right (good) things, and some wrong (not so good) things!
My daughter is a gifted communicator even though she rarely speaks in sentences. “Mom” is one word that has a multitude of meanings. There’s one version of my name that I hate hearing, the one that conveys to me that she is upset or scared. As she yells “mom,” I often cry out to God in those moments, too.
One year after the pandemic began, there is still a great amount of fear and uncertainty involved in our daily lives. Reflecting on 2020, there were so many days and weeks that led me feel completely abandoned by God. So having ‘faith’ in God may seem like shallow words, when one is dealing with intense crisis and pain. But one thing that has helped me have faith is to reflect on those times when God showed up, even when I didn’t expect Him to. I had such an experience recently, where I found myself in a familiar place, having my faith tested very much as it has been in the past.
